Ascent Healing

I made this piece of artwork in my journal yesterday to illustrate what I hear a lot from clients in my practice, and what I know from personal experience as well, and that is that feeling nothing is much worse than feeling anything else. I hear from many clients that they wish they could turn their feelings off: which is possible from dissociation. But once they turn off their feelings, they often do things to make the feelings come back such as self-harm, making rash decisions, doing very fear-promoting activities like driving fast on a freeway or other activities…. We are meant to feel! Some people think that the ultimate goal of life is to figure out how to be happy ALL the time. But this isn’t possible and it isn’t really ideal either! Being happy all the time would be like coloring a coloring book only having the color yellow. We need ALL the feelings to make a well-rounded experience.

We need opposites to notice and appreciate the good! How many of you have gotten a sore throat? It’s hurts so bad right? And whenever I get a sore throat, I ask myself, “Why wasn’t I happy last week when I didn’t have a sore throat? I didn’t realize how luckily I was to not have this pain!” Then when the sore throat heals, I am so happy! But I am happy because I now appreciate being reminded of the opposite. Being sick makes me grateful for when I am well! But after awhile, I again take health for granted. So being sick periodically, actually increases my happiness because it reminds me to be grateful for my health.

Think about this in your own life and see if it applies. If you have sadness, does it increase your happiness when you are happy? Perhaps this is something you haven’t considered before. I love animals and so I have several pets. I have also experienced the loss of a pet many times in my life. It is excruciating to lose a pet and some people decide the pain isn’t worth the joy of the many years they had with their loved furry friend. For me, I feel it is very much worth it. It is so many years of joy to have my kittens grow up and cuddle and all the things that go with it. I will be sad when they die- but for now, I will be happy being with them.